My World

I'm feeling overwhelmed. I feel as if I have SO much to do. I really don't have that much to do, and in the grand scheme of life, if it doesn't get done tonight...oh well!

I didn't go to David's Friends. There goes my perfect attendance. I slept. Now, I'm doing some laundry, so I won't have to go to work naked tomorrow. I was going to put in another load tonight...but nah. The load in the washer is all for tonight. God only knows when I'll find time (and an empty washer) to do more.

I decided that FTD Delivery Inquiry is as stupid as it gets! So, I can track my order 24 hours after it should have delivered...72 for international. DUH. By then, I'll know if the person got it or not.

I'm so sick & tired of being broke. Its the story of my life and I 100% understand that only I can change it...I also KNOW that if money problems are my only problems I'm doing good. Shell sent out an email this evening asking if a bunch of us wanted to go to Cedar Point in a couple of weeks. I'd LOVE to. I love that place & I haven't been all year...or last year, I don't think. Of course, I won't be going because of my financial situation. Back to being grateful for the things I have!

I talked to ST for awhile today. I'm vey content with where our friendship is at. For all of you that have this little idea that ST & I are getting back together...its NOT like that at all. We are friends, nothing more, nothing less. I still feel like he's keeping stuff from me, but he never was the best at communication. I've managed to (for now) seperate his stress from mine. To be able to laugh, cry, ramble, without a care in the world is such a nice feeling. To be able to have such an honest converstation, about stuff that hurts, about the opposite sex, is so nice to know, I have someone I can trust, someone that respects (but doesn't always understand) me for me. Part of today's converstation was about me crying over him and I don't think I've cried sad tears over him in a good month or 2. I'm making such progress, I will NOT go backwards. I feel like we are finally breaking down some walls that I put up. One of the biggest reasons I put up walls was because I didn't want to cause any problems within his relationship with Ann. The other walls I put up, are easy to come down when its someone you trust, respect, & care about. At what point, will I stop comparing everyone of the opposite sex to him? Our relationship was great, our friendship is great...but obviously he isn't the right one for me. I know I'm in a place, mentally, where I can date...yet, I know its screwed up if I still compare everyone to him. Enough rambling about ST.

I don't remember comparing Red to ST. I miss Red. I wish he wasn't so far away, that things didn't have to be so silly right now. Oh well...my life isn't on hold for anyone. I'll be single forever, I know.

I need to find a new nail place. Yes, I'm picky. I want somewhere that takes walk-ins, that speaks english...english that I can understand. The paint job on my nails SUCKS.

Blah blah blah. Yes, I'm aware my moods & emotions regarding ST & life in general go all over the mood. I'm a female, that says enough.

That's all she wrote.