I Will Carry You

I am dead pass out tired!  I have NO idea how I'm awake enough to type this.  I have NO idea how I'm going to manage to stay awake for another 3 hours.  3 hours of Mom-sitting (thankfully she's doing decent...and she's sleeping!), laundry, this that & the other!

I went to visit Gma.  When I talked to her on the phone today, she called me out on something.  Its so nice to know, at least, her head is getting better!  She said she knew I have been depressed again lately (shock shock) because I haven't called or seen her that much and she knows I run to my room and hide as much as possible.  Ding ding ding.  And I thought I HID that stuff!  Guess I'm not fooling to many people?!

Tomorrow is work, lunch shall be the bank and all that fun Friday stuff.  After work, I'm heading to the library.  Then, my friend & I are going shopping to get stuff for our Halloween costumes & grabbing dinner too.

Saturday afternoon/evening I'm going to the cider mill & hayride with a friend from high school that I haven't seen in well over 7 years. 

I'm excited AND nervous about my weekend plans...because its all SO outside of my box.  I keep reminding myself that friend is safe because he's J's brother and J would kill him (and bury the body where no one would find it) if he messed with me.  I keep reminding myself that the friend from high school is safe because she was my friend long before I got social phobic and paranoid of people.  The thought of meeting my high school friend's boyfriend and daughter does freak me out a little bit.  Not because they aren't safe (they know someone I know...so they are okay) but because just AHHHHH!  I don't like meeting new people.  It makes me want to panic!!!!  It will all be okay.

Enough rambling!

God is love!