Carry On

Its after 3am, and I'm awake. Not because of Mom, but because of myself. I'm doing the best I can right now to talk myself out of a full blown panic attack. Its like trying to talk someone off a cliff, I'm imagine. My heart is racing so fast, I'm sweating (and its FREEZING here), my brain is on overdrive. The confusion that my brain and heart are in right now is just about unmanagable. I have no where to turn but to myself and God. I just don't understand what's going on and its killing me slowly. I know deep down, on way or another, this all will work itself out, but right now, its just a mess, I'm a mess. Where did I go wrong, what did I do wrong, what's wrong with me?