You Left Me There

With gas prices CLIMBING out of control like they are, the thought of looking for a new job has been on my mind a lot. I have a feeling its time I stop thinking about it and start looking. The thought of job hunting, resume faxing, and job interviews makes me want to vomit.

I was planning on staying at Gma's on Thursday night (see above complaint regarding gas prices) but my 2 cousins & Gpaw will be there. No thank you.

My house is a bunch of crabasses right now. Actually, that's an UNDERSTATEMENT. I'm beyond pissed at my Dad. I'm sick of getting yelled at when he's pissed at Jo. I'm sick of having to take the higher road & not scream & cry back at him.

I hate feeling like I'm not a good enough friend.

I hate when people think they've been in your shoes a million times before, yet you've NEVER been in theirs. NO ONE has EVER been in ANYONE ELSES shoes, things might be similar...but NEVER the same.

I feel bad for Jo. I know she'll argue with me all day & night...but its MY blog. She's got some of the lowest self esteem around. Until you are happy within your own skin, until you LOVE yourself, its IMPOSSIBLE to find love. Stop looking for it in all the wrong places. Stop trying to force it with everyone. Also, for reasons that are beyond my comprehension, you still care about some others a lot. Until that's gone & cleaned up, you won't be able to love openly & honestly. I know I'm not perfect (shhhh! Don't blow my cover!), but I've been thru the mud called love.

My Cousin's mom just called my cell phone. She's been divorced from my Uncle for a good...10+ years now. I don't like you, AT ALL, lady. You beat my Gma up. Some people might have forgot, but not I. You had an affair & child on my Uncle. Some people might have forgot, but not I. You dragged my Cousin & Uncle thru mud for years. Some poeple might have forgot, but not I. She needed to talk to my Gma, you know, the one she beat up. Gag me with a spork.

What doesn't kill me, makes me stronger. God doesn't give me more than I can handle.

T out.