Beautiful Life

Jo thinks she can tell me to stop saying GO PONDER.  HA!  I'm actually done pondering for now though.

I slept SOLID for the whole 5.5 hours of sleep I got.  I think a train could have rolled through my bedroom and not bothered me.

So, I showered after 22:00 last night.  I wish I could be a guy and just got to work without showering this morning.  Maybe it has less to do with being a guy & more to do with my "routines". 

Work is my friend.  Who cares if I don't get my reports out!  I love my job. 

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Hear Me Calling

I still haven't showered, so I sit here all sticky, stinky, and sweaty.  Ahhhh.  The joys of softball!  As far as I can tell, I'm going to like this team!  We won 14-4.  My first at bat, I had a sweet hit, burning the right center fielder.  The next 2 at bats, we won't talk about.  Its weird, I did the same thing last year...1st hit good...then it all went down hill. 

Dad also batted 1/3 today...but his team LOST (5-8).

Friendships take work and I am NOT going to do ALL the work.  I should have seen these issues coming a mile away...but I live in a fantasy land sometimes.

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Wheel Of Fortune

To say work sucked for ME today, is a HUGE understatement!

My power nap sucked too!

I've decided I can't go to David's Friends tomorrow, I've just got to much to do in the city.  :-(  Blah blah blah.

I don't want to go to softball right now...but whatever. 

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

The Sign

If I wasn't poor, I'd call into work just to sleep today!  I'm trying to remind myself that (normally) the more I have going on in life, the better I do.  My good mood is starting to slip, I realized that late last night.  It will be okay though...because even if I do end up getting depressed...it won't last forever!

Actions speak louder than words!

Happy Tuesday!  Its only a 4 day work week!  YAY!

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Go Down

I love my family!

Operation Swimming Pool is NOT complete.  I was back outside for another 30 minutes or so tonight & will be out there a lot more in the next few days.  I've said it before & I'll say it again.  My Dad (who I love dearly & have a ton of respect for) is the STUPIDEST smart person I know!

WEEEEEEEEE. 

The 3 friends I need to talk to, I still haven't.  I talked to 2 of them briefly yesterday, but not about the issues I need to.  Yet, the issues seem less important now.

Jo's best friend (that she's known since she was 2 or 3) is here for a few days.  Kristina's family currently lives out of state, so to have her here is nice.  Yet, her being here reminds me more that her Mom passed away.  Sheila was a driving force in getting Jo & I to Church, to God.  I could go on & on about how great & funny Sheila was.  She passed away at the age of 39, from breast cancer about 3.5 years ago.  Kristina's entire family (her parents, grandparents, aunts, cousins, brothers & sisters) are like another family to me.  I miss them so much...especially when I'm reminded of how close we used to be. 

Take everything at face value.  Go ponder.

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Bad Boy Boogie

Operation Swimming Pool is just about complete.  My part is complete, at least...well, I think it is.  What my Dad said at 21:00 last night would take less than 2 hours today...took OVER 5.5 hours!  Right about now, I'm going to pop some Morton, relax for about 30 minutes, then nap! 

I still need to do my normal Sunday chores, do laundry, and straighten my bed room.  WEEEEEEEEEEEE.

I'm so out of it, I can't even put complete thoughts together.  Peace.

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Dog Eat Dog

Operation Swimming Pool is kicking my butt!

Blah.  Bahhhh Hummmmbug! 

My Dad is CRAZY if he thinks I'm NOT napping before I do my normal chores.  I'm in a for a long day, either way.  BLAH!

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Knocked Out

That was the WORST 4 hours of sleep EVER! 

We are on break #1 of yard work (yard work has been a huge amount of reinstalling the swimming pool).  I need to eat, I know that, so I made a salad and tossed in some left over grilled chicken & I'm having to CHOKE it down.  I don't know if its because my stomach is in knots or if its because working in hot sun causes me to not want to eat.

Ignoring things will not cause them to go away.  Go ponder.

I'm sitting here in my own pissy mood, for whatever reason (but I'm overall, in a GOOD mood!) thinking about how its unfair my stomach is in knots, its unfair that my Dad is making us do SO much work this weekend, blah blah blah.  Then I think about what TODAY is really about.  Its NOT about a picnic, its NOT about an extra day off work.  Its about those that lost their lives fighting for MY freedom, fighting for MY Country that I love dearly.  As often as we complain about things in this Country, like the price of gas, or taxes, or the President, or whatever...we have it GOOD here & I wouldn't want to live anywhere else.  Happy Memorial Day!  Take a second today, and just remember those that gave their ALL for us & remember how GOOD we have it!

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Do It

Something else on my mind...

*The more you get, the more you want.  Go ponder.

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Ride On

So, I just typed out a big paragraph...but I can't post it right now.  Something about, I'll always let things spew for a while first.  Let me just say, my stomach is in knots.

I went out with ST & Ann tonight.  It was uncomfortable for me, until about 10 minutes after we got to the bar.  After that I started to relax & have a good time.  Out side of my box, yes.  More than I could handle, no.

I have to be back to doing yard work at 10:00, so I should get some sleep.  Let me just say...AHHHHHHHH.  Good mood lives on...just now with knots in the stomach.  Sometimes you just have to go with that GUT feeling!

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Give Me You

I'm over the moon excited!  I just got back from my shopping adventure.  I didn't get as much as I wanted, couldn't find stuff that I could wear for work & life really.  I did grab 1 sweater, 2 skirts, and 1 fancy tap top thing (which MIGHT get returned, its not something for work, not something I can wear to Church events, requires an uncomfortable bra, its LOW cut....but SUPER CUTE!)  Adding up the tags, totals $120 (not including tax)...and I walked out spending less than $59 (including tax).  Go me!  What's even cooler than that...the one skirt is a size 8.  MIRACLE!  MOTIVATION HERE I COME!!!!!!  Of course, I think this stores clothes run on the big size...but that's okay!  I got a SIZE 8!  You have NO idea how cool that is.

If you never have something, you don't know what its like to miss it.  Go ponder.

I called two of the three friends I need to talk to really bad.  Of course, like I thought, no answer.  ERRRRRR.  Patience!

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Here

Let me just say WAHOOOOOOOO!  My shorts that were WAY TO TIGHT last summer are falling off right now!  I hate belts, but I got used to wearing them with my jeans, so I guess my shorts shall be no different.  Off to buy some clothes for summer, that FIT!

I'm (slowly!) getting motivation back to drop the rest of my weight.  I CAN do this!

One last thing...A girl has her needs too.  ;-)  Go ponder.

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Today I Started Loving You Again

I feel like I'm going to pass out any second. I'm 100% aware its a blood sugar issue. I just drank about 20 oz of orange juice, and ate a small snack, and its NOT helping. I'm shaking like a leaf, and if I move, I'm light headed. Not cool. Blah.

Church. I was NOT paying good attention, to say the least. My mind is to busy over processing the rest of my life. The 2 IMPORTANT things I did get from the message today...was PATIENCE and FORGIVENESS. Interesting. Oh yeah...something else, something about how God's timing and our timing are 2 different things. Amen to that!

21Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?" 22Jesus answered, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.[a] 23"Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. Matthew 18:21-23 (NIV)

Yesterday I said I needed to talk to 2 of my friends. Scratch that. Its 3! Two, I might, hopefully get to talk to today, and the other one tomorrow. Just ERRRRRRRR. Patience, I know.

I've got yard work to do in a few minutes (which is great, cause I feel like I'm going to pass out...so sure, lets do yard work in 88 degree heat), then maybe hopefully some shopping. I've got a huge coupon to use by tomorrow! We shall see.

I've been going back & forth about what to do regarding my cell phone. It MUST be replaced very soon! I'm 100% getting rid of Nextel! I haven't used my 2-way in over a year. I was debating between Sprint & Verizon. ST & SML both have Verizon & I talk to them the most, by FAR! But...CJ has Sprint, and I talk to him a lot (well, when we talk, we talk A LOT!). Well...CJ switched to Verizon last week. So...I guess that really means I need to switch to Verizon. Now, to just come up with the stupid deposit money (which makes me cry, because mistakes I made at 18, I will be paying for, for the rest of my life!)

WEEEEEEEE. I'm still in a good mood. I hope that doesn't change when I talk to my 3 friends...it might, but whatever. I'm taking this good mood and running with it! :-)

God is good, all the time. All the time, God is good!

Fashion Party

I've got some responsible adult health decisions to make in the next week or so and it sucks!  Before, I always had someone to go to regarding issues like this...whether it was Mom or ST.  Now, I don't really have them to turn to & I don't want to deal with things...but I MUST & I will!!!!  I hate hate HATE dealing with medical professionals.  Things can't be ignored.  These issues won't go away on their own...tried that, isn't working.  I know, I know...the easy road isn't always the best road.

I need to talk with 2 of my friends, and I can't until tomorrow night at the earliest. THIS SUCKS! 

Go Pistons!

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Big Balls

Rules are meant to be broken!  What about promises?  ;-)    I'm in such a good mood, goofy mood.  WEEEEEEEEE!

No regrets!  Nothing more, nothing less.

Why must I take simple things in life & make them complicated?  Why must I be the most impatient person in the world?  Why must I always want what I can't have?  Why must I build walls up towards most people?  That's right...because I am ME!

God is doing some interesting things in my life right now, I just hope I don't mess them up.  Free will is a dangerous thing! I need to take my own advice and just HAVE FAITH. 

Princess Whiny B*tch is alive and well.  The newest reason I wear my name with pride is because I won't leave myself emotionally vulnerable & emotionally available to a select few (few=two) that would like me to.  Whatever...they brought it on themselves.

I haven't mentioned it lately...but let me remind you.  Red is adorable.  While Red is adorable...more importantly, CJ is freaking HOT!!!!!!!  The joys of eye candy.

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Strange Ways

I feel like I have a bad hangover!  The only problem with that is I only drank water yesterday!  Hmmmmm.  Maybe ST drank last night, cause I used to get hangovers for him.

Its going to be a fun weekend in the SUN!  Yes, the SUN (and heat!) finally came out in Michigan!  Today is going to be yardwork day.  I'm about to go start working on my garden, turning dirt & that fun stuff.  Dad's working on opening the swimming pool, so I'm sure I'll have to help him here and there.  I need to move my trampoline so I can weed wacker that area.  I also need to turn over the dirt in Mom's flower bed & dig up so weeds around the yard.  Fun day.  SPF 45 here I come!

I'm in such a GOOD mood!  YAY!!!!!!!!  Nothing more, nothing less.

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Every Other Friday At Five

The past 24 hours have been interesting to say the least.  :-D 

It was a good day at work!  Power-tripping control freak boss wasn't there, so that was GREAT!  Add on it was Friday & a 3 day weekend!  Wahoo!

Then, I got a quality nap!

Then, I hung out with my buddy SML.  We grabbed some dinner, went and looked at cell phone, and than to play putt-putt.  I won!  I don't think I really did...but SML will never admit to letting me win, cause if he LET me win, he'll DIE!  :-)

Then, I ended up hanging out with some other buddies of mine.  Not the smartest thing ever (if I would have started out leaving the city heading to my friend's place...it would have been maybe an hour drive, but NO.  I was going home...so yeah...2 hours later, I get to my friend's place...then it was about an hour home from my friend's place.)  Just chilled, relaxed, laughed, talked, laughed, laughed, and laughed some more with people I don't see often enough.  My face is hurting from laughing so much...hours later.  I'm glad I made my little road trip, even if I didn't want to at first...but what are friends for?! 

Things to ponder...
"Laugh or cry, happiness is a decision." -Pops Boise

Have faith, and God will provide all. God uses ordinary people to do extraordinary things.

I have no idea what I'm doing the next few days.  I'll just say life is interesting.  WEEEEEEEEE.  I need sleep.  I could just ramble for hours.  I'll stop, I swear.  SLEEP NOW!

Don't hold your breath.  Nothing more, nothing less.

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Thankful Man

While I hate to promise or guarantee anything...if I was a betting person, I would definitely put lots of money on the idea that I WILL be taking a nice quality nap with 45 minutes of walking in the door tonight.

Rain sucks!  I wish I could control the weather, but then again, I want to control everything!

TGIF!!!!!!!!!!

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Lucky Love

I flew like a bat out of he*l to get to my softball game on time.  Get there by 17:45 to find out that Red's Oldest Sister told me the wrong time, we have a 19:30 game...NOT 18:00.  So, whatever...come home, eat dinner, & head back to the diamond...to get rained out.  We had some of the nastiest thunderstorms I've seen in a LONG time tonight.  My drive back home was probably in the top 5 of worst rain/thunderstorms I've driven in.  Thankfully, we only have two games starting at 18:00...I hate having to RUSH like I did today.  Also, I believe we only have two games on the same time/days as Dad's team.

My Dad is really on my nerves lately.  The biggest annoying issue of late, has been address as directly as possible (for now).  Actions speak louder than words!  Just ERRRRRR.  He tends to be ungrateful.  He doesn't think before he speaks often.  He doesn't think before he acts often too.  He's BY FAR, the STUPIDEST smart person I know!  Add on he's stubborn, always right, its his way or the highway, the world revolves around him, and he knows everything...and you can see why we are butting heads.(I'm NOT admitting to being a lot like him!)
 
I have ZERO plans for my 3 day weekend.  I don't know if its a good thing or a bad thing.  I am expecting work to be hopping tomorrow....everyone wants to ship everything before a holiday weekend...like the freight is going to move over the long weekend, ha!  I had a birthday party to go to on Saturday, but that has been postponed.  We were keeping JM & TOY for the weekend, but their Dad would rather them do something with him since the birthday party got canceled.

My head is full of randomness.  Stressed, confused, impatient, etc.  Everything will work itself out, I'm sure.  Everything happens for a reason.  While, I'm not depressed lately, I am just very blah.

Friendships, just like all other types of relationships, take WORK.  Work from ALL involved.  With my girl friends especially, I always expect them to put in the effort.  Could explain why I can count my girl friends on one hand.  I came to this realization today, partly because of the email from the old friend & partly with it being Ingrid's last day at work.  I emailed (and got a reply) from the old friend.  I don't see anything coming out of the situation but us exchanging a few emails.  We are at different points in our lives and add on the not pleasant past.  Then there is Ingrid.  I hope Ingrid & I stay friends, but for some reason, I'm not holding my breath.  I'm going to start putting a better effort into my friendships.  I already did 2 things to get the ball rolling.  Actions NOT complaining!  I have a few more things I will take care of in this aspect soon (probably over my long boring weekend).

I stepped SO far outside of my social phobic box today, without panicking (no crying, no vomiting, no shaking, no racing heart).  I was nervous...but it was manageable and didn't consume me all day.  I dealt with things ALL BY MYSELF!  Of course, at one point I had to stop, pray, and get myself together.  I'm SO proud of me.

I feel like I have more to blog about, like I'm holding back.  I'm anxiety ridden right now & I don't know exactly why.  I had to deal with things today that should have sent me over the edge, yet I came out just fine.  Now, its almost (past!) bedtime...and I'm getting that PANIC feeling.  YUCK!  Go away, you aren't welcome here!

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Cruel Summer

The power went out in the middle of the night.  It would have been nice if I wouldn't have woke up in the middle of the night to know!  I ended up using Jo's phone for an alarm clock.  The power came back on about an hour ago.  I don't want to go to work today.  Blah.  Its game day!  YAY!  Its pay day.  YAY!

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Wave Wet Sand

The quote I was referring to earlier today...

"Realize that if you have time to whine and complain about something, then you have time to do something about it." Anthony J D'Angelo (The College Blue Book)

David's Friends was decent tonight. Its VERY different from how Pastor D "taught" things. I feel like I'm being singled out lately, and I'm okay with that...I just don't want the others to feel ignored. I'm starting to like Mell more & more each day. He's like another brother, I never had or wanted. ;-)

Softball tomorrow at 18:00. It shall be interesting AND way outside my social phobic box! The only person I know on the team won't be getting there until AFTER the game starts. I'll be okay though. I'm actually NOT nervous about that (yet). I'm excited!

When power napping, SHUT OFF YOUR CELL PHONE!

God is good, all the time. All the time, God is good!

All That She Wants

Read Each One Carefully and Think About It a Second or Two (This came courtesy of my cool boss/friend Jess!)

1. I love you not because of who you are, but because of who I am when I am with you.

2. No man or woman is worth your tears, and the one who is, won't make you cry.

3. Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

4. A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart.

5. The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them knowing you can't have them.

6. Never frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.

7. To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.

8. Don't waste your time on a man/woman, who isn't willing to waste their time on you.

9. Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one, so that when we finally meet the person, we will know how to be grateful.

10. Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened.

11. There's always going to be people that hurt you so what you have to do is keep on trusting and just be more careful about who you trust next time around.

12. Make yourself a better person and know who you are before you try and know someone else and expect them to know you.

13. Don't try so hard, the best things come when you least expect them to.

REMEMBER: WHATEVER HAPPENS, HAPPENS FOR A REASON!

God is good, all the time. All the time, God is good!

Edge Of Heaven

Is it possible to be truly HAPPY for someone, yet jealous at the same time?  That's the crap going thru my head right now.  Actually...I know its possible, but it just sucks! 

I need to get my fat butt back in gear.  Why is it SO hard to get motivated right now?  Even joining the "Chub Club" at work hasn't helped.  Bahhh humbbbbuggg!

This HAVING to work until 16:00 M-F really puts a wrench in my summer way of life.  Bahhhh hummmmmbug! 

Ingrid's last day is tomorrow & to say I'm sad about it would be an understatement!  As they say...life goes on.  It will be interesting to see what happens to our friendship.  I don't deal well with change.

Power nap before David's Friends.

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Happy Nation

Many years ago now, I once read a quote that said something along the lines (and ST is always telling me stuff along this line too!) of "If you have time to complain about something, you have time to change something."  I'll post the exact quote later, I know exactly where I have it!  Its easier to just complain!  BUT, the easy road isn't always the best road!

I love my family.  I will be in bed before midnight tonight!  Hopefully, by 21:00!

Happy Wednesday!

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Rocker

I didn't get to watch American Idol OR The Academy of Country Music awards tonight.  I'm not happy about that...but oh well.  Its only TV.  I got (am getting) laundry done, playing online, and did some bible reading/studying (about my topic du jour...jealousy).

Regarding the girl from my past that sent me the message.  She never did apologize for any of the things she did to wrong me.  The day the crime was committed was the last time I talked to her (then again, I think I cried & yelled...not much talking that day).  The email didn't mention the past at all, good or bad.  It was basically just "I'm married to NAME, 2 kids, got a degree, but am a SHAM.  Email me" 

Just Blah.

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Waiting For Magic

Is there a difference between self-esteem and self-confidence?

Work was actually decent again today. YAY! That's 2 decent days in a row!

My mood has been pretty good lately, not depressed at all. I've been blah & had an attitude for no real reason...but all in all, I'm doing good!

Jealousy is a bloody, dangerous thing. I'm trying...but yeah. All I have to say, is I'm NOT perfect, just forgiven!

19The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; 20idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions 21and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.
22But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. 24Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. 25Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. 26Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other. Galatians 5:19-26 (NIV)

Obviously, my only problem isn't jealousy...but its the one eating at me lately.

God is good, all the time. All the time, God is good!

Never Gonna Say I'm Sorry

Someone sent me a message via MySpace.  She sent it from her sister's account, cause she was just checking to see who she knew on there.  She gave me her email address and told me to drop her an email.

If I think about all the good regarding this girl, I want to get in contact with her.  The thought of the bad regarding this girl makes me want to vomit.  I'm shaking, just reading her message.  This girl hurt me much more than any other female EVER has!

She was a good friend.  She was my roommate when I went away to college.  Even after I moved out and got a new roommate, we remained friends.  The issues came up when she went thru my journals, stole my calling card, and than about a week after we moved home for the summer...the straw that broke the camels back, she was the accomplice in a crime committed against me, my house, and my family.

Like I said...was.  I know I hold a grudge.  Part of me wants to get in contact with her & catch up...BUT part of me says she's up to no good.  I don't know.  People change.  I know I'm NOT the same person I was in 1998.

Getting in contact with her could help me mentally figure things out...maybe.  She was probably my best friend during the time I started to mentally fall apart.  The crime was definitely one of the LARGEST turning points in my (mental) life.  BUT...I don't trust her.  I don't know.  As of right now, I'm going to pray & let things spew for a few days within my head.  I'm CONFUSED to say the least.  Thoughts...opinions?

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

The Jack

Dad's game.  Well, it was good to see everyone (some of the guys go to the Presbyterian Church, so we only see them in the summer, basically).  The umpire gets there, and my Dad needs to be calmed down before 1 pitch is thrown.  "Yellow, I swear, he's the WORST umpire EVER!!!!!!  I swear, He's STUPID.  My 8 year old Grandson could do better.  You'll see.  He's just BAD!"  Dad's team gets off to a good start.  They are winning 11-2 going into the 5th inning.  They lost 13-14.  The call that ended the game even had the other team in shock.  Whatever...it was the first game & its just for fun.  Red got his head shaved & it looks really BAD!!!!!!  We were friendly, like always...a little (joking, I think) attitude, but no tension.  YAY!  Red will be leaving for Wisconsin in a few hours...and should be gone for about a week.  There goes my eye candy. ;-)  He's still eye candy, but he needs to keep a hat on right now. 

No softball until Thursday now.  Yay!  I will have time to do laundry tomorrow...and go to the gym.  GYM!  If I don't go, ya'll can beat me. ;-)

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Dancer In A Daydream

I Love My Job (The Lost Dr Seuss Poem)

I love my job, I love the pay!
I love it more and more each day.
I love my boss, he is the best!
I love his boss and all the rest.

I love my office and its location, I hate to have to go on vacation.
I love my furniture, drab and grey, and piles of paper that grow each day!
I think my job is really swell, there's nothing else I love so well.
I love to work among my peers, I love their leers, and jeers, and sneers.
I love my computer and its software;
I hug it often though it won't care. I love each program and every file.
I'd love them more if they worked a while.

I'm happy to be here. I am. I am.
I'm the happiest slave of the Firm, I am.
I love this work, I love these chores.
I love the meetings with deadly bores.
I love my job - I'll say it again - I even love those friendly men.
Those friendly men who've come today,
In clean white coats to take me away!

God is good, all the time. All the time, God is good!

Double XL

I have NO idea what I'm going to do on days I have 18:00 games.  Today, I have 15 minutes to change & be out the door to WATCH Dad's game.  AHHHHHH.  Oh well.  I love it.

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

My Mind

My love/hate relationship with sleep lives on. Today, I most likely, will NOT get my Sunday afternoon nap. Well, I went to bed at about 03:00, alarm is set for 09:15. 07:00 I wake up! ERRRRRR. I just couldn't get comfortable. I force myself to lay in bed until about 08:30 and some idiot is outside cutting grass. At first, I thought it might have been the punk that lives across the street on his dirt bike...but no, its my lovely Daddy cutting the grass! ERRRRRRR. I swear, STUPID STUPID STUPIDEST smart man I know!

Went to JM & TOY's baseball games yesterday. I'll have pictures soon. I hate when they play at the same time. At least, this year they were on diamonds back to back...not at complete opposite ends of the park. JM's team lost (they went into the last inning down loosing 2-3 and lost by 8!) TOY's team won. Both boys did GREAT! TOY has improved SO much. JM is one of the best on his team, by far! I'm not just saying that cause I'm his Aunt! The really cool part about that...he's the smallest & youngest on his team! (He's always been good, that since after 1 year of t-ball, his Dad has always had him play a year old than he should be.) I also got to see John, I miss him SO much. When I first got there, we are walking towards each other (note: I have NO idea when I saw him last...probably last June sadly!)...and he yells "Baby Girl, what's happening to you? You are disappearing on me!" Hehehe! Yay! It was really great to see John, catch up & stuff. I love him. He's great. He's still my same old brother in law! (Yep, he's still my brother in law even though him & JJ have been legally divorced over 4 years now..."T, JJ divorced me. I didn't divorce your family.")

I have to remember miracles usually don't happen over night. Baby steps! Progress! All that good stuff!

This afternoon, I have to go to a BBQ at Favorite Aunt & Uncle's house...just to BBQ. It has nothing to do with the fact that Favorite Aunt turn 40 next Saturday. The big 4-0! While, we were given SHORT notice (we got invited at about 15:30 yesterday) and it does mess up my Sunday nap...I wouldn't miss it for the world. I love this part of my family. And actually...even the family I don't like as much as this part of my family, I do love. Family comes first...always.

Did anyone watch the Reds vs Tigers game last night? AWESOME!!!!! My favorite player Brandon Inge needs to step it up though! I saw from the bottom of the 5th inning thru the 10th inning. He went 0-2 (that I remember!) and had an error! That doesn't it kid! But hey...they won and are doing great. It was AWESOME to see Comerica Park sold out and totally packed! I'm sure Ingrid & company had a great time. Don't get confused...my favorite MLB team is still the Indians, but a VERY close 2nd is the Tigers. Yes, I like pro baseball. Those that think its boring can just BLAH. I'm a nerd...a sports nerd, I know. Its MUCH better than a computer nerd. ;-) (That comment is just for you, SML!)

While we are on the sports subject...Go Pistons! Thankfully, Favorite Uncle has a TV on his deck, so we will be able to watch the Pistons vs Cavs for game 7. CRAP! I just thought about it...coming from Gma's house to Favorite Uncles I'll have to take a different route...I'm NOT dealing with traffic near The Palace.

I should get ready/packed soon.

God is good, all the time. All the time, God is good!

Into The Night Of Blue

Mission Impossible: IV (aka Silver Shoes for Shell's wedding) has been solved! Ingrid & I went to dinner (including our chocolate nacho dessert) & shopping. She drags me into stores I normally wouldn't venture into. Lord & Taylor just isn't my type of store. I found cute shoes & hell, I've already tried on a hundred pair...what's 2 more? I told myself I could spend $60 on shoes, without freaking out...knowing I'll probably only wear them once. Well, the shoes are $59.99 BUT marked on sale for $43.99. Score. YAY! I actually LIKE the shoes! Get to the register & they ring up on sale for $32.99! MAJOR YAY! If my digital camera was functioning (well the camera works, but my software died)...I'd post pictures, but yeah. I will sometime. They are CUTE! I'm happy!

I'm VERY excited! God is doing some awesome things in my life right now. I had my head buried in The Bible for hours tonight. Some things I need to remember...1) Something is better than nothing. 2) Do NOT get discouraged! 3) Do NOT let others discourage you! 4) Have hope & faith always! 5) I am stronger than I know. 6) Something is better than nothing! (Yes, right now, its something I need to repeat)

16"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son,[a] that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. 17For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. 18Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because he has not believed in the name of God's one and only Son.[b] 19This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but men loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. 20Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that his deeds will be exposed. 21But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what he has done has been done through God."[c] John 3:16-21 (NIV)

John 3:16 is probably the most known Bible verse in the world, but for the first time (that I remember) I read it in context tonight. God sent his Son to SAVE us! How cool is that?

I'm sure I have a million other things to blog about...but they just don't seem that important lately. I do have sad news real quick. Ingrid put in her notice at work. Her last day is Thursday. You have NO idea how sad that makes me. For starters, she's AWESOME & takes SO MUCH stress off me & helps WAY more than she knows. Plus, she's my real friend...and she's leaving. Back to eating lunch alone. :-( I'm very happy for her, that she's getting out of hell...but she needs to take me with her ASAP!

God is good, all the time. All the time, God is good!

Everything Takes Me Back

In the past week, I've been doing some deep soul searching of sorts.  After the drama that happened last Saturday...I decided something & everyone that needs to know has been informed...so...

I'M DONE!  Done with the Red situation.  D-O-N-E.  Now, I will be nice, and friendly with him for sure (and he's still nice eye candy) but I'm DONE letting myself be emotionally vulnerable & available.  This has been a year in the making...and he did it to himself.  Of course, there will be plenty of posts about how adorable I find him...but the emotional level has been cut off  & I don't feel bad or anything. 

Lots to do...like eat.

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Live Wire

TGIF!!!!!!!!

I'm sick & tired of being TIRED all the time!

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Dimension Of Depth

There aren't many givens in life...but one of those is CHANGE!  People change, plans change, times change.  Change isn't always a bad thing...but its isn't always good either.

I'm stronger than I know. I'm stronger than I give myself credit for.

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Let There Be Rock

So...I have softball in a little bit.  Well, that's not entirely true.  See...there was practice scheduled for today, but someone decided the field was to wet/muddy to practice on.  My good friend, Red's Oldest Sister decided we should still get together and have our own little practice.  So, Jo & I are going to play softball at Red's house...with Red, Red's Dad, and Red's Oldest Sister.  Since Red & I aren't exactly on speaking terms (actually...its me not speaking to him to be more specific) this shall be fun.  I can't believe what a smart aleck I was to Red's Oldest Sister when she called.  "T, how about you & Jo and your dad, if they want, come over and we can have our own little practice with my Dad & Red?  T says..."Yeah, cause YOUR brother is JUST WHO I want to deal with."  Oooopss!  That wasn't nice.  I want to deal with him, I just want him to remove his head from his youknowwhat.

So...I have plans tomorrow with CJ's cousin.  Since she's my friend and needs a blog worthy name...its Ingrid.  She picked it out herself.  Ingrid's a goof. 

This is way to much outside of the box socializing going on right now!

My Dad pisses me off!  Oh well, his fault.  Vegas here I come.  ;-)

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

So Long

To say I'm anxiety filled & stressed lately would be an understatement.

I've got a lot going on, but at the same time...I'm figuring out a lot about myself.

For starters...Red.  I think the BIGGEST (aside from him being adorably cute!) reason I want there to be something there SO badly, is...his family likes me.  They like me for me.  If you know anything about me, you know that the thing ST & I fought about the most, BY FAR...was his family.  So, the idea of someone's family LIKING me makes me happy.

Next issue...I'm trying to work thru lots of mental issues within my head right now.  I figured out I have a huge issue with rejection.  I can't handle rejection in any shape or form.  That's why I tolerate things I shouldn't.  That's why I live in a fantasy land often.  Onward & upward.

I've got softball in a few minutes.  Joy.  My head hurts.  Then I have to go to Home Depot & get a new key made for my bedroom door so my Dad will stop climbing in the window.  Then I have to bake for a work party.

What is going on with Pistons?  All I have to say is...Go Tigers!  Leland, the managers of the Tigers (in his first year with the club) said something along the lines of "Being in 1st place doesn't matter until after the final game of the season."  Good man!!!

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Can I Sit Next To You Girl

What on God's pink Earth was I thinking by NOT giong to sleep until after 01:00 for the 2nd night in a row???  I'm moving SO slow today.

I hate being an adult sometimes.  I'd much rather just call into work & sleep.

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Jackson

Sleep is overrated!

So, I finished watching Walk The Line.  It is one of the BEST movies I have seen in a VERY long time!!  Its seriously, a classic!  For me, its right up there with Grease & Patch Adams!  GREAT MOVIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Come Home

Posting via email is so nice & easy.  I'm SO lazy.

My friend, CJ's cousin (since I have no other name for her) commented today on how good my skin was looking.  (We are new product whores together...and I got new face gunk last Thursday)  Of course, NOW I feel my face breaking out like mad.  Stupid bi*ch jinxed me!

Sleep is my friend.  Tomorrow, I'm going to be computer free in the evening.  Napping, reading, and gathering my thoughts will be on the "to do" list.

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Don't Turn Around

Want to know what a true friend is?

Today, at work, I got blue ink pen on my khaki pants.  To know me, is to know that I had a slight (not that big...but bigger than necessary) meltdown over it.  Well, Robert came to return some things he was working on...and goes, "T...look what I did, just for you?"  And there was a huge blue ink pen mark on his khaki's.

Of course, when I washed them tonight, it didn't come out...so into the trash go my pants.  Good thing I got them on cheap clearance 2 years ago or I'd be REALLY not happy.

Work is actually (for now) getting better.

This weekend is the Hoe-down & I don't know if I'm going.  Probably not...but never say never.  I've only went once in my "adult" life & it SUCKED but times & friends have changed. 

Friday, I have PLANS with my friend that needs a name...cause she's the only girl I hang out with lately.  CJ's cousin isn't a good name for her.  The plans...Chocolate Nachos & well...we will figure it out. 

Good mood better stick around! 

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

I Need You

Why do I do stupid things like go to sleep after 01:00 when I know my alarm goes off short after 05:00?  Its going to be ROUGH today, getting back into the routine of the gym...but I'm MUST start sometime/somewhere.  Blah.

Happy Monday!

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Living In Danger

Old habits die hard!

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Skin

MySpace is an addictive CULT! 

My summer officially starts next Monday (with the start of Dad/Red's softball) so I will be hitting the gym hard this week.  I shall be pretty busy until mid-July now.  YAY!  My weeks will go like this:

Sunday: Church, gym, nap, housework
Monday: Work, gym, Dad/Red's softball
Tuesday:  Work, maybe gym, softball  (maybe gym because it depends on if I have a game...no gym for me on my game days)
Wednesday:  Work, gym, Church
Thursday:  Work, softball
Friday:  Work, gym
Saturday:  gym

It shall be a good week, I got my quality Sunday nap!

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good.

Opposites Attract

I'm such an antagonist!  I KNOW I get it from my Mom.  Jo is in a pissy mood.  So, I'm bugging her about playing softball this summer.  Then Mom starts bugging her about chip dip, then I start dancing in front of the TV.  LMAO!  Its so fun.  So, as of right now, Jo says she's not talking to me for the rest of the day.  Shall I hold my breath?

Church was GREAT today!  We had a Pastor from another Church today (the Church to the west of us, that I go to on special occasions).  The message was taken from this passage:

1In the presence of God and of Christ Jesus, who will judge the living and the dead, and in view of his appearing and his kingdom, I give you this charge: 2Preach the Word; be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke and encourage—with great patience and careful instruction. 3For the time will come when men will not put up with sound doctrine. Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around them a great number of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear. 4They will turn their ears away from the truth and turn aside to myths.  2 Timothy 4:1-4 (NIV)

We have 3 tools to help us do that...1)  Prayer  2)  God's Word (The Bible)  3)  Our Witness.

Other happens at Church.  Most of my David's Friends people weren't there...no Erob, Thick, Mell, Jo, & Red.  I have no idea where Red was.  Its NOT like him to NOT be at Church.  Hmmmm.  After talking to some people & praying...the drama I flipped out about last night has calmed down some. 

Church softball WILL be happening this summer, like normal/as planned.  Men start a week from Monday & who knows when the women start.  Its going to be a little bit different, but change can be good.  ;-)  Lots of players aren't coming back & all that jazz.  It shall be interesting to see if Jo and/or Red's older sister play.  I'm glad that Red's oldest sister is playing.  I hardly get to see/talk to her lately & I miss her!

Happy Mother's Day!  I got my Mom a gift card to Bronners.  Of course, the $25 gift card I got her, is going to cost my Dad hundreds!  ;-) 

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Young And Proud

DRAMA!  I don't need DRAMA!  I'd like to say I'm done with a situation, but nothing is ever final with me.  I'm a little hurt, annoyed, and heartbroken of sorts.  Time for me to become even more antisocial.  My biggest issue though, is the DRAMA.  Everyone in my business.  I can't handle it.  If I wanted YOU in my business, I'd give you an invitation.

While being single SUCKS, I'm proud to be President of the Staying Single FOREVER Club. 

I have nothing nice to say, so I'll say nothing else.

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Trust

I wish people could really grasp how paralyzing it is to suffer from social phobias.  I hate it more than anything.  There are lots of things I hate lately, lots of things I don't like about ME...and I can't think of anything I dislike about myself more.  Some of the people I consider to be my best friends, I can't even pick up the phone and call them.  Hell, there are 2 people that aren't blood related to me, that I can call without getting all anxiety filled...and that's not always true.  Just blah.  The thing that gets me about this...until I was about 18...I was VERY social, VERY outgoing.  I can basically pinpoint what changed me, I just don't know how to get back to being social.  New situations just make me want to crawl in bed and cry...or die.

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

And Then There Was You

My sister has a crooked nose!!!!  Jo's home & that was the 1st thing I notice.  Apparently its been that way for 20+ years and I just realized it.

Finding shoes for Shell's wedding is going to be a REAL task for me!  Blah. If I wanted to wear 5 inch spike heels, I might be able to find something...but yeah.  I want silver shoes, with a small heel.  They must have some type of adjustable strap, or go between the toes...preferably both.  ERRRRRRRRRRR.  2 shopping trips down, God only knows how many more to go!

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Love Me Like There's No Tomorrow

I watched about 5 seconds of Walk The Line before falling asleep. I managed to sleep from about 01:00 until 10:10, only waking to look at the clock/roll over at about 08:00. That's so good! I'm doing so much better at not having to go to the bathroom 5 times in the middle of the night. GO ME. I'm strange.

The weather SUCKS! Its a Saturday in May. I want to play softball, play on my trampoline, do yardwork, fix the pool, something, anything NOT indoors. Blah. Wet cold yuck.

So, instead I'll toy around on myspace. Its a cult, I tell you.

God is good, all the time. All the time, God is good.

The Way That You Love Me

My only plans for tomorrow (today technically) have been rained out.  JM & TOY's opening day for baseball has been moved to next Saturday.  Bahhhh humbug!  Next Saturday shall be BUSY. 

I need to stop being so judgmental!  I need to remember if EVERYONE was alike in this world, this world would be a VERY boring place.  While, I really like myself & tend to think my way is always best/correct...that might be what is best for ME, not for EVERYONE.

The new Nick Lachey "Whats Left of Me" CD is good!  Very good!  The Daniel Powter CD is decent.  Now, I'm off to watch my new movie (Walk The Line).  I'll report on that later.

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Cold Hearted

Its Friday! TGIF!!!!!!!!!!

This budgeting gig is going to be difficult for me...VERY! I have money, I like to spend money! Blah. I can do this! Starting June 1st...or something like that. ;-)

I'm in a really good mood! YAY!!

God is good, all the time. All the time, God is good!

Cuts Like A Knife

Some of the qualities I HATE the most in others, I see myself having right now.  NOT COOL!  Somethings WILL be changing ASAP.

My head is THROBBING!  I can't function.  3 hours sleep isn't helping.  Stupid storms didn't help my lack of sleep.

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Straight Up

After going about 5 rounds with ST tonight, including a "do you want a real friend or fake friend" comment by ST...I have to say, I love that kid.  The topic at David's Friends tonight was Finances (Budgeting & Tithing).  That is a VERY touchy subject for me.  After much fighting & resisting on my part, with tough love, patients, and some down right snottiness, ST got me to work thru a rough budget with him.  Let me just say, I PISS AWAY A TON OF MONEY!

ST has been going thru a TON of junk in his own life.  This week, Monday when I was sick specifically...for the first time in the past 3 months, I really felt like I had ST back.    ST, that I desire to be friends with more than anyone can understand, was back!  Monday was the first time, in at least 3 months (I think 5 really), that I told him "I love & miss you."  I mean that truly.  I love & miss him, as one of my dearest, deepest, and best friends. 

I've had conversations with a select few regarding ST, especially ST & I.  It seems as if my family, until I am married to someone else, they hold onto hope of ST & I reuniting.  Where I value ST greatly as one of my best friends, I can clearly see reasons we will not be an in a relationship again.  If things would have been this clear in Oct/Nov 2004, life would have been a lot easier!  I do still, hold true to my word, whatever girl snags ST truly snags a winner. 

I'm going to bed soon.

About violence.  I'm still SUPER sorry that I punched SML out of anger.  Well, I'm also glad things ended with CJ how/when they did.  To say his anger management issue got the best of him over the weekend, is an understatement!  Of course, I don't have the entire story...but I don't think I need it.  Friends...probably not.

I've said this before, and I'll say it again.  Never say never.

God is good, all the time. All the time, God is good!

She's Got Balls

There are a few things that everyone should know about me by now. 1) Don't LIE to me! 2) I must eat OFTEN!

Let's address issue #1. I can handle the TRUTH. No matter how bad...I'd rather hear the truth than be lied to. No matter how big or small...TELL ME THE TRUTH. Well, let me tell you something else...Don't assume either! Well, yeah...after some stupidity on MY part...yeah, I was WRONG. There was no lie. I'm human, I make mistakes & I can admit that!

Onto issue #2. There are two things regarding ME that you just don't mess with! My sleep and my food! Well, to make a long stupid story short...since Sunday evening, I've probably eaten 1/2 a days worth of normal calories. I'm trying to drink as much water as I can...but that's not going that hot either. My head is throbbing. I'm crabby as hell. I'm moody as hell. I'm beyond negative. I can't think straight. I'm shaking terribly. I feel like I'm going to pass out. Yeah, its just not good. Now, do NOT DARE think this not eating thing has ANYTHING to do with my weight or my fatness! IT DOES NOT! I am pretty skipping sure this is doing more harm than good. (but on a happy fatness note...I did do my tae-bo after all today) Green bananas anyone?

Now...I'm not in the greatest mood...but I did get to see Red. I got to feel his arms too. ;-) Jo, I think he came home in better shape (with bigger arms for sure!) then he left! Other than that, I'm annoyed, I guess. He changes SO much in a group vs a few of us. I can't wait until he calms down some, I can't wait to get some "alone" time (cause Red's a strange bread, I use the word "alone" very loosely...someone else is always very near by.). I need normal Red, the Red I trust, the Red I can talk to, the Red I can laugh with, the Red I have fun with...not this insecure, must show off & talk to much about stupid stuff Red.

There is a terrible rumor going around that there might not be ANY Church softball this year. I'm SO sad...I could cry. If that really happens, I probably will cry.

I'm SERIOUSLY sad & SHOCKED that Chris got voted off American Idol! With the 3 that are left I want Katherine to win, Taylor in 2nd, and Elliott in 3rd. I see Chris having a much bigger career than the 3 remaining.

Blah blah blah. I will forget I'm hungry if I'm sleeping.

God is good, all the time. All the time, God is good!

The Night They Murdered Love

So, I should be working out (tae-Bo on Wednesday in the courtesy of my bedroom since I don't have time for the gym really) but I don't feel like it.  I haven't felt like working out for a while now...but tomorrow or Friday is a new day.  Back on TRACK.  I'm happy to report though...I'm weighing in at a happy light 144lbs!  YAY!  That's 28lbs in the past year!

The beginning of my day sucked!  Then, it got better as work was going along.  After work I was in a REALLY good mood.  Now, I'm just blah.

I'm concerned with a friend of mine.  I hate feeling helpless.  Then another friend of mine, well, I guess I'm hurt & annoyed.  Its funny, in some strange twisted Princess T way, I often say "everything happens for a reason" well, lately I'm seeing that.  Its slightly emotionally painful...but I'm overall content with all the choices I've made & where I'm at in my life.

On a brighter note...I get a free (small) smoothie tonight AND I get to see Red.  ::Swoon:: 

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Knocked Out

Trying to keep a positive attitude is just about impossible in this house! 

I HATE when my routines get messed up!  I REALLLLLLLLLLLY HATE when my morning routine gets messed up!

I HATE my job with a PASSION right now!  I have NEVER hated a job this much...NEVER!  I HATE HATE HATE the power tripping b*tch of a boss too.  I don't like using the word hate so much...but seriously, I'm SO unhappy there!

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

High Voltage

I still feel like sh*t!  I haven't vomited in 16 hours, but I feel like I might at any given second!  I'm weak in every way possible.  I have hot/cold flashes like I'm in menopause times 10!  I haven't slept more than 2.5 hours straight since Saturday night.  Just AHHHHHHHHH & Blah!

I'm stronger than I know.  I'm stronger than I give myself credit for.

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Ave Maria

My Dad & Jo are forever calling me the prude of the family.  Its a label I wear with pride.  I tend to not show that much skin.  I tend to not be a slut.  I tend to have a great deal of self-respect.  I tend to follow rules/laws.  Seriously, if that makes me a prude...I'm cool with that.

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

My Mama Said

While I complain about people not taking marriage seriously & getting married for the wrong reasons...I do see how the idea can be VERY tempting!  I dislike this house & the people in it annoy the piss out of me so often...the idea of running off & getting married is tempting...VERY tempting sometimes.

I live with 3 people.  The 4 of us, all tend to think the world revolves around us.  I feel like junk (but I haven't vomited since 13:00) & people won't help me with a simple task.  People think they know everything all the time. Yeah, I'll just shut up right now.

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

See Jane Run

So I tried to cut/paste a cute quiz I took, but the code won't work & I'm not the computer genius & I really don't care right now...so blah. I hate computers.

I'm eating pretzels & they taste nasty. I think the reason I think they taste so gross is I know they are going to come back up within a matter of just a couple hours. I just feel blah. Everything (like walking to my car & back) takes SO much energy, that I just don't have. This flu can really f*ck off!

I managed to sleep for about 2.5 hours this morning. YAY! During that time, I have a crazy dream/nightmare of sorts. Note: We live on old farm land, with VERY few trees. The houses are pretty spread out around me. All the houses are on 4-20 acre lots.

~So, the house to the southeast of us caught on fire. Then it spread to the house to the east of us. The fire was jumping like crazy. Things were exploding & the fire would jump like a 100 feet at a time. At one point, I grab 3 (out of 4) of the cats put them in my Dad's truck. Chase the dog around my house & get her into the truck to. The reason for putting the animals in the truck was so that Dad could just jump in the truck & drive off. I still had plenty of time, I was heading inside to grab my scrapbooks & my leather coat that came from my cousin ET. Then, there was an explosion and the fire jumped within 10 feet of the house (it was weird, it came on a diagonal, closest to the garage, not the other side of the house, where the other fires were). My Dad was outside with the garden hose, trying to wet things down. (There still was no fire dept here) Dad told Jo & I to get in my car & leave. So, later we catch up with Mom & Dad. The four of us are fine, the house & all the things are ruined...including the coat & the scrapbooks! 2 cats died too. How 1 of the cats got out of the truck & into the fire, I don't know! I don't know what cats died either.

It was just a terrible dream. The strange thing, the leather coat (which I'm VERY attached to!) is in my car (in real life). Its almost always in my car. Why did I freak out about the coat?

God is good, all the time. All the time, God is good!

Love At First Feel

When flossing your teeth must be stopped so you can vomit (for the 3rd time in the past 4 hours), its probably a good idea not to finish getting ready for work.

Vernors, a bath, and my bed. 

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Bang A Boomerang

25"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? 26Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life[a]?
28"And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' 32For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. Matthew 6:25-34 (NIV)

I believe it was the week after Easter, I took a hard blow spiritually. I know specifically what was said & by whom. I can't get discouraged so easily. It pushed me away from the Bible & my devotions. Back on track...NOW! I've got to work on not letting others bug me so much.

Nummmy...vomit.

God is good, all the time. All the time, God is good!

Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap

***I had SML, one of my very best friends, proofread this post, to make sure MY thoughts were as clear as could be, that I wasn't going out of my way to offend certain people.  I just need to get some things bugging me off MY chest.  I want to cry & vomit lately, regarding these subjects.  ***

I know I have VERY alternative views from mainstream America on many issues. 

Now, these are MY views, MY thoughts, MY opinions!  I am PERFECTLY aware that EVERYTHING does NOT work for EVERYONE!  I am also PERFECTLY aware that when I'm in a given situation my current views/thoughts/opinions could change.  Now, the great majority of my views/thoughts/opinions come from educating myself.  Of course, being the Christian I am, I view the Bible as a helpful educational tool...trusting & having faith in God always.  The 2 issues that are hot buttons with me right now, are situations I've NEVER been in first hand.  So, like I said MY views COULD change....just EERRRRRRRRRRR!

Homebirth is just ONE of these issues.  Now, I have EDUCATED myself EXTENSIVELY (especially to NOT be having a child anytime soon!) on the subject.  Its something that I wholeheartedly believe is something great.  I hate (and avoid!) the topic of childbirth with most people.  I hate that America tends to treat it as a medical PROBLEM.  The subject briefly came up at work this week, that I'm PRO homebirth (FOR ME!) and the girl wanted to start a war about it.  Toss in that when (IF) I ever have children I see myself being so "opposite" of mainstream.  I'm sure this is a war I'm going to have to get used to.  Seriously, though...the uneducated make me want to vomit.  If YOU want to have your baby in a hospital because you think its best for YOU...GOOD.  Don't dare tell me that homebirth is TERRIBLE when you know NOTHING about it!

The next issue of mine...is divorce.  FOR MYSELF, I'm VERY anti-divorce.  Perfect reason I'm not getting married ANY TIME soon.  In general though, I believe America as a whole GIVES UP on marriage to often, to quick, these days.  Obviously, I KNOW there are times when getting out of a marriage is the best thing to do.  Add in that people often get married for the WRONG reasons these days too.  When JJ & John got a divorce, I took it VERY hard.  They were the first people I was REALLY close to, that divorced.  When ST & I broke off our engagement, the thought of divorce, the FEAR of it, was one of my main reasons.  (At the time, I had about 10 reasons...but the fear of divorce was in the top 3) Now, currently some friends of mine are in the mix of this whole divorce junk.  2 sets of friends should have NEVER married.  They know they got married for ALL the wrong reasons.  1 set of friends is just giving up to easily. First real issue in their marriage & its time to hang up the skates.  It saddens me, seriously makes me want to VOMIT, the thought of how America basically takes marriage as a joke.  Get married, get divorced...no big thing.

Again, these are MY THOUGHTS/VIEWS/OPINIONS!  They aren't meant to hurt or offend ANYONE!  I know what works for one will NEVER work for all. 

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

Freaking Out

MySpace sucks!

I just wasted about an hour or so, looking for some people on there.  4 people really...and not a single one of them is on there!!  I did stumble across ST on there (one of the people I was looking for graduated from ST's high school).  Nothing exciting or incriminating.  The photo he has is one of my favorites though.  ;-)  Actually, I can't think of a picture that I like better (that is of ST alone & as an adult).

Dinner or no dinner?!  Sleep now or later?!

God is good, all the time.  All the time, God is good!

It's A Long Way To The Top (If You Wanna Rock & Roll)

Church today, was great for a million and one reasons. I'm having a hard time without having Church at OUR Church on Sunday nights...but it won't be this way forever! The main verse from today's message is below...emphasis mine, of course.

3And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, "Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. Revelation 21:3 (NIV)

I survived JJ's baby shower. Mom did MUCH better than I thought she would. YAY! I'm on my unable mental roller coaster, so I don't feel like writing a lot. I can't wait for softball to start...both mine & Dad/Red's. Red's hot! I'm SO happy he's home. We shall see...he made progress today!

God is good, all the time. All the time, God is good!

Took Her To The Moon

Courtesy of Rhi

10 Things to Ponder in 2006

Number 10 - Life is sexually transmitted.

Number 9 - Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

Number 8 - Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

Number 7 - Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they don't bother you for weeks.

Number 6 - Some people are like a Slinky...not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.

Number 5 - Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

Number 4 - All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

Number 3 - Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?

Number 2 - In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2006

We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America but we haven't got a clue as to where thousands of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration.

God is good, all the time. All the time, God is good!